Have you found yourself alone this valentine’s day? Same here Mumma, same here! In fact I think I have spent most Valentine’s Days without a romantic partner! Sounds sad right? Valentine’s Day as A Single Mum can feel really lonely if we let it.

It can be hard to see all the happy couples on social media, all the cards and the flowers in the shops, and even if we are happy being single, it’s natural to wish that we had someone special to spend it with.

If this is your first Valentine’s day as a single mum, I imagine you are really feeling the pang of loneliness that this day can bring.

But all is not lost my Unhinged Friends! Take it from someone who has spent many a valentine’s day without a valentine… There are plenty of ways you can Feel the love and romance this valentine’s day- regardless of your relationship status!

Valentines Day Is Just Another Day

What is Valentine’s day anyway? It is literally just a day, February 14th- the middle of winter- if you are in the Uk it is a pretty miserable time of the year!

The way I see it is that whilst it may be a made up holiday, it brings a little bit of love and joy into these dark and dreary days.

We are all about romanticising and loving life whilst thriving here at Single mum Unhinged, and moping around on the literal Day Of Love will not help you to get there! I am not judging, I spent many a year pretending the day did not exist and crying myself to sleep, but for years now, I have celebrated it my way, and it has made me much, much happier.

In fact I now see it as the absolute perfect excuse to pour all the love that is in the air into me, and unapologetically indulge myself in luxury and self-care. And you know what?

It feels so fucking empowering to know that I can make myself feel just as good as any Man can!

So here are some great Ideas on how you can spend Valentine’s Day as a single mum so you too can feel the love this Valentine’s day.

Ideas For The Perfect Solo Date

Dating yourself is literally one of the best things you can do for yourself as a single mum- and what better time to start than on valentines day?

Bringing up kids alone means we can easily lose ourselves if we are not careful, and dating yourself is the best way to find yourself again and begin romanticizing the shit out of your life! After all, self love is the real love. 

So here are some fun activities and Ideas for solo dates you can try on Valentine’s day.

Gourmet Dinner for One:

Treat yourself to a delicious meal. It is up to you if you want to eat out, but if you would rather not face all the loved up couples, then cook your favorite dish, order takeout from a fancy restaurant, or better yet, experiment with a new recipe.

Go all out on yourself too, set the table with candles, red roses, and your best dinnerware for an elegant experience.

Spa Night at Home:

I love a good spa night… Forget the couples spas, how about a friend spa? Go to your local spa with a friend, or create a luxurious at-home spa experience with scented candles, a bubble bath, face mask, and soothing music.

Maybe even Invest in a robe or slippers to make it extra special.

Movie Marathon or Book Night:

Grab a glass of your favourite wine, a bowl of gourmet popcorn,or a decadent dessert, and pop on a feel-good or empowering film- maybe steer clear of the romance films if you’re still in the midst of a raw breakup. If you prefer books over blockbusters, curl up with a book that’s been gathering dust for a while.

Don’t forget to grab a blanket and some comfy pyjamas, and munch your way through some chocolate! 

Creative Expression:

Do you have a creative streak that you have been holding back on? Now is the perfect time to express yourself by tapping into the heightened emotions of the day by Spending the evening painting, journaling, or even crafting.

Getting creative can help you to release pent up emotions and also relax. It is good for the soul.

Star Gazing or Evening Walk:

Depending on the weather- and where you live, grab a blanket and a hot drink and take a moonlit stroll (with or without the kids) to experience the magic of the sky.

Stargazing can be so therapeutic, looking up at the abundance of stars can really help to put things into perspective.

More Ways To Make Valentines Day As A Single Mum Romantic

As well as the activities above, here are some more things I do to make valentine’s day that little bit special and romantic- because I am worth it, and so are you!

• Create A Playlist:
  Curate a Valentine’s Day playlist complete with Female empowerment songs, or listen to an inspiring podcast.
• Dress Up for Yourself:
  Stop keeping your best clothes for special occasions. Put on your favourite outfit, one that makes you feel fabulous, even if you are at home for the entire day- Dot it for you!.
• Treat Yourself to a Gift:
  Don’t wait for someone else to buy you pretty things. Go and Buy yourself the most Beautiful bouquet of flowers , a piece of jewelry you have had your eye on, or even something small that makes you happy- indulge yourself because you deserve it!

Dealing with Loneliness As A Single Mum On Valentine’s Day

I know what you are thinking, all these ideas sound great in theory, but you are still feeling lonely. I know, I have had long periods of time where the loneliness was so painful.

And it is ok… it’s no wonder that as a single mum you will feel lonely at times- especially on holidays. You are doing life alone after all!

But there are some ways that you can make it just a little less lonely…

• ​Call a friend or arrange a Galentine’s day- even if the kids have to join in. Buy or make each other cute little gifts.
• Find online communities of Single mums- You can meet up on zoom or facetime and have your own little party.
• Find singles nights- If you are childfree on Valentines, then see what singles events are on, and you never know, maybe you won’t be alone again this year!
• Host a Singles Dinner- If you have a large group of friends, gather all the single ones and enjoy Valentine’s day together.

Love Yourself First This Valentine’s day

The whole point of this post is to let you know that it is perfectly ok to spend Valentine’s day romanticizing, and prioritizing yourself!

Take the emphasis of loving someone else away and focus on Self-love this year if that is the situation you are in. 

Celebrate yourself and the absolutely stunning and amazing person that you are, because you are incredible!